Somalia says ‘Feel free to kick some pirate asses.’
MOGADISHU, Somalia - Foreign powers can use force if necessary to free a hijacked cargo ship loaded with battle tanks and heavy ammunition, Somalia’s foreign ministry declared Wednesday – increasing pressure on the Somali pirates who have demanded a $20 million ransom.
Now the question is, how did we figure out who Somalia’s Foreign Minister was? My guess is they approached the guys in the nicest truck with the biggest guns in Somalia and paid them off with a case of Bud Light. As Mohamed Jama Ali, was tossing back his ninth beer we must have popped the pirate question on him, to which he stated: “The international community has permission to fight with the pirates,”. I’m sure the response was more along the lines of “Sure why not, I’m not getting a cut of that action anyway. By the way do you have any Doritos?”.
The annoying part is the Russians are looking to horn in on our action. OK it is their ship and all, but we got there first.
The Russian guided missile frigate Neustrashimy, or Intrepid, is not expected to reach the Somali coast for several days. However, the state-owned Russian news agency RIA-Novosti, quoting a high-level Navy official, says the frigate is carrying marines and special forces commandoes.
Now we can’t let the Russians beat us to the punch. Hell they’ll sink the ship killing everyone on board and declare victory. Time to kick the Navy in the ass and give then the go order already. Isn’t that what we have these guys for?………… Ruck up swabbies. Time to go to work. AAARGH!
